Five star soccer

I´m voiceless.. Really, I am! I watched the game at a friend´s house, along with a bunch of other freaks- his family- and it was great!

It´s the foth time Brazil have won soccer´s ultimate prize.The victory completed a remarkable journey for Luiz Felipe Scolari’s team, who had been written off before the World Cup following a poor qualification campaign.Ronaldo confirmed his reputation as the world’s best striker by winning the Golden Boot award for the tournament’s leading scorer with eight goals. And I was just thinking… Three years ago Ronaldo was said to be an underdog… We are all very proud of him. For his recuperation, and his great return! We are all proud of the whole team!

It was a great game! Let me celebrate now!!!!

From the heart. The semester has finished as hectic as I expected, not as peaceful as I wanted. Hopefully I´m still on a ‘feeling the simple things’ basis.

I have just gotten from the movies- watched BladeII…. Had some fun with a couple of friends.. Am home alone enjoying my house. Ok, after the film I´ve seen, I´m a bit scared..

In a few hours I´ll go to a friend´s house. And there, meet other friends to root for Brazil, suffer and shout together… If it wins, we´ll celebrate. If it doesn´t, well… we´ll hang out the same way!

You see? Simple. Almost meaningless for some. but this is peace for now. And precious to me.

From the heart!

I lied yesterday. A conscious lie, clear, from the beginning to the end. I hate lies. The concept, the reason, the words, everything! I have always thought about what drives us to deny when we should support or invent when we should confess. My answer seems obvious to me: consequences. 

Have you ever realised how some people force us to lie? Or even to hide truth? This truth would not be accepted. I could just have asked for a second chance, but I know I wouldn´t have gotten it. I had to invent, simulate, deceive, and then , get my ends. Lack of understanding, lack of listening, lack of being less radical. Each situation is unique, analyse all of them in a single way.

One judges and condemns in a matter of seconds. I do not encourage lies, but I know the mistake is not solitary. We dig our own mistakes. People look for their own truths in order to satisfy our concepts and expectations.  We´re in the age of solitude. In the age of the search for acceptance. We demand, order and blame. We deny our own mirrors, we walk along empty roads… And, when we demand what we could give by ourselves, I wonder… Who are the true liars?

Thank you, Caetano!!!

welcome to my garden

 virii  Jail  Ferhazel  ElysianFields

What drives you crazy? End of semesters drives me mad! I usually get a bunch of homework to correct, reviews to be checked, students whining, sleepless nights and lack of time even to have a good meal.

But I cannot complain. I love what I do! And I do get an immediate positive response while working- in class.  I have got some advanced groups this semester. All of the advanced students should present speeches on whatever they want. I generally ask them to bring samples or hand outs in order to turn their 15 minute talk a bit more interesting. And of course, it is my turn to also learn from them! I could say it is something like ‘show and tell’.

I´ve got great speeches this semester. Better than that, I have gotten really nice people to teach. And to work with. Some of them are already like friends. Others are people I usually smile at, whenever I see them.

I had a visit of a supervisor two weeks ago. I have been teaching for 8 years now, but I still get nervous when I have someone watching my classes. The worst part is, that they never let teachers know they are coming. They just knock on the classrooms´ door, ask you to excuse them and… God!

I was confident. She liked my class. It was good, I know, but I had to thank my students too. It was a group of 11 teenagers. Not only they behaved, but they have also made the class flow in a very pleasant way. That was so important to me, that I had to let them know that! And I did feel how important and meaningful that was to them.

I feel good! And I already know the groups i´ll have next semester. Nine other groups…. At about 60 new people to meet. And I wonder if they´ll be able to feel the pleasure I´ll deposit on what I´ll do, with them during each class…

ps.: I made this drawing during a break I had yesterday… The drawing course will start next semester… Hmm.. More pleasure to come!

I dont know how to be precise, exact, predictable. If those out there like people like that, why don´t they look for a math equation? It is weird. It is too weird and unusual.  I have broken down the fences that bordered the territories of logic and madness.  And now, everything is a huge nothing.

 And nothing is a lot to me.  I´m alone in an inner battle against my worst  enemy. I´ve got no weapons and no reasons. I wish I could just stand from where I am and do everything I should.  I wish I had the courage…but my bed is so cozy…

I am not trying to reach the mountains because they simply chase me. Need to take any attitude, but  the safety in my sadness is so comfortable… Happiness turns me into another being, the one I am mostly used to. All of a sudden, if my world breaks down again, I´m not sure I´ll be able to assemble it.  Perhaps I´m afraid of seeing that its peaces are just drops of illusion. I just wanted to know what to do with the key, now that I have unlocked my heart…

do you want some? I´ve got plenty of it!