Changes….welcome!

With every step of the journey, you are faced with infinite choices. Each choice will lead you to a whole different life, you will know different people, do different things and be someone different. You make your choice, by serendipity or by careful thought and when you take a step in that direction, the other choices disappear. The doors slam shut behind you with finality. All you can do is look ahead where again your choices lie. Such is life dearest, you can never second guess – only hope that you will be thankful for this life, these things and these people.

light snuck in
and made the doorknob glow
reflections of gold everywhere
bouncing off the walls
shining in my eyes
I woke up
and looked around
and wondered why
you weren’t there
in that space next to me
that id carefully left
just for you
my bed just had me
but there was room
for you
I wondered why
you weren’t laying there
still asleep
eyes closed
lips slightly open
tempting me to wake you
with just a single kiss

Vanity
In this culture of mirrors, I’m searching for anything that will reflect my own image back to me in a more flattering light. Dim these stunning flaws, fill in the gaps within my mind so I don’t realise I need anyone else. Escalate my independence, make loneliness despicable (just a cheap excuse for physical affection – who needs it anyway?).

“Opposites attract” become obsolete in this place where like minds are too accessible. I only have to tolerate my own reflection, the infinite reflections of reflections of myself. I don’t want anything complementary. Only compliments. Tell me I am fine on my own. After all, you are only there to soothe my ego.

Distract me so I cannot see where my self fades thin and threadbare from too much stroking. But only until I become bored with your method of distraction and find someone new to take your place.

Ps.: I couldn´t help biting my nails, I didnt find my new home yet, My trip to Canada  will just depend on my new job, and… Thank you all for the prayers!

.Say a Little prayer for you….

.when anyone is as tired as I am right now, it’s usually after climbing huge unsurpassable mountains, or after running the marathon a few dozen times. no mountains scaled, no tape cut in half by a final surge of breathe. this is the fatigue of success, something that i never thought would come a-knocking so soon. i could have a lil party to celebrate, if my aching body could think straight right now. instead am holed up inside, jabbering to someone i don’t really know. pondering the things that will see me running around tomorrow again. a fresh lap, a few hurdles to jump over. somehow, somewhere i know this is just a meagre start to a long race.

• today I´ll go for an interview to a new job
  
• today I´ll check some new places to move in two months
  
• today I´m supposed to get a call from travel agency about my scholarship in Canada
  
• today I´ll try not to bite my nails.
  
• today I´ll need some good prayers…..         

Thank you all

Te regalo mi locura
Sin condiciones ni secretos
Mi poesía absurda
Te doy cada momento

Te regalo mis palabras
Y si quieres mi silencio
Hasta cada pensamiento
Te doy todo lo que siento

Te regalo mi pasión
Mi piel ardiente
Y el sabor de mis labios
Te doy todos mis deseos

Te regalo cada sueño
Y memorias infantiles
De mi vida cada instante
Te doy todo lo que soy

Dame tu locura. Déjame ver al lado completamente absurdo de ti. Demuéstrame que eres humano – incluyendo cada defecto. Prometo no darte cualquier cosa menos.

El amor no es razonable. ¿O si?

One More Attempt

A lot of people have been complaining about not being able to get to my page and commenting. I honestly have no idea of what was going on, so I decided to remove a bunch of things from the page. Some say it was my background, but again, I´m not sure about that. If you can enlighten me about something, I´d be more than glad. I´m trying out a new background, and if it freezes your computer, please do let me know.

Thanks, you all 

 morning alarm radio sounds
somewhere between weather
and song requests
i hear zeppelin again

eyes closed in my head
dreams chase each other
fighting for last memories
in waking life

no return to the dreaming
not for now

sunshine creeping in the window
light scattered on the floor
sleepy feet shuffle across 

Apostrophes
Maybe I’m only half here after all. The accumulation of exhaustion presses on my scalp, my neck, my throat, across the flat of my chest just below my clavicle. My ears ring with things I have not done, with words I did not know how else to carry into today. I have not slept in years, have been living lives that were never mine in moments that were never possible. This formula does not add up. In this state of confusion, of frustration, of never-enough-sleep, I discover that my strength reaches deeper than my perception, that there is always a little more, that I am exactly where I should be even if I don’t know where this road leads. And I think this could be what happiness feels like.

Should i go on a hiatus? Maybe…I have been forced to do so. Things have been changing fast and sometimes  I wonder whether my life has become a Mexican soap opera. Or any soap opera actually.  My room mate is getting married in 2 months. I was already getting used to the idea of being without her… she´s also taking the computer away…damn… Ok, jokes apart, the situation now is pretty serious. Life for me next year will be quite different. I would be much more excited if I weren’t that concerned in making ends meet.  Being independant is damn great, but I must say sometimes it is a pain in the neck, head and pocket.  Well, guess all choices have a price… But the thing is, I´ll be living in a place I have not even chosen yet. A different neighborhood.  It´s a bit far from downtown, but much closer to work, church and new friends. Also closer to the College i inted to end studies, great pubs and cafés, and….guess those are enough reasons for me to know there´s nothing to worry. Also, the faith in my God and the lessons He has kindly  taught me just make me understand how much human I have been.

I just lack inspiration these days. This, added to the lack of time has taken me away from my blog and my subscribers also. I may be closer to some of them in person now that I have decided to go  to  Vancouver in July next year. It is just about time i traveled abroad, i guess. It is about time  things changed in my life. Just like it´s happening now.  Just like that…