February 14, 2004

• Do you know….what it feels like for a girl?

  
  

  So this is it. I´m now here in my bedroom on the 13th floor of a building, writing from my new computer and listening to the music people play outside. Rainy day. Cool one as well. It does not show, but I sometimes still find myself a bit scared about being now 100% independent. Although the hectic pace of my new routine does not even let me remember about that. I already have exactly the right amount of discipline and sense of duty to be able to accomplish quite a bit of this huge load of new stuff. My  thinking is clear and I will find that my sense of time and restriction is working in my favor to help me figure out the puzzles that present themselves. I´ve got this strong will that will aid me in the completion of just about every task I may undertake. That is something good.. really it is..

  
  

  Classes at the new school started on Feb 2nd, and at the old one today. Both of them are challenging this semester for very different reasons. At IEBB(  Bruno Bettelheim Educationa Institute) the groups are much larger, and I also have a huge age student age difference to deal with. The young kids scare me most. Yes, you read right, they scare me! Mainly because I am too concerned about doing a good job, and I´m not used to very young people. But the challenge is really interesting, That made me choose my next course at College which is Education. I´m interested now in learning a bit of Psychology and all the procedures in the area of education. Not that I didn’t´t need that before, but I have been teaching English for private schools for a long time. That demands much more knowledge in language than in behavior. Something tells me now I have found my way… something…

  
  

   At CCAA( Anglo American Cultural Center, they also have branches abroad) ) classes are ok as well. The school is now reformed, and we are starting to use DVD in class. Till this semester the classes were lead in CD ROMs. This is novelty in terms of English classes here, and should be as well gratifying to me.

  
  

  A good thing about living by one´s self is the relation with money. Today I can say I  have a banker’s precision. I usually recheck everything, from my expenses, to my investments,  not to mention how much I have paid back on my loans, or loans I may have made to friends. I feel like  keeping at it! This is the time to do it. And despite what others think, it’s important. Making ends meet can be tough. But it is as well as great to be able to make plans with what I earn. I have decided to come back to College, so I´m not going to Canada at least in the next 2 years. Instead, I will try to accomplish an old dream which is to travel around Europe by train. I have set that with my good friend Liliana, and I´ll put some energy on that. I have many friends in Europe and I hope I am able to meet some. If not, my mind and soul will be blessed anyhow.

  
  

  Now I just have to be careful about my health. I have been trying to get the rest that I need. Preventing sickness and maintaining  full control of my mind and body by making sure I give myself the proper amount of sleep is an important goal. Tough to be reached once I find mind at its peak throughout the day till late at night. Did I mention gym? Yes…gym.. always!

  
  

  There´s much to say… but now I have all the time to update.  Things are fine. Church courses and friends have been greatly important. I have been meeting really nice people who have taught me a lot. And I have changed a lot as well. For the best, I hope. There´s much to be done. And I pray to God that He keeps holding my right hands towards his will. And become a better person. Always.

  
  

  Happy Valentine´s Day, you all!

  
  

  
  

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  This is to my beloved…wherever he may be

  
  

   Only an ocean away

  
  

   I see a shadow every day and night.
  I walk a hundred streets of neon lights,
  Only when I’m crying.
  Can you hear me crying.
  So many times you always wanted more,
  Chasing illusions that you’re longing for.
  Wish I wasn’t crying.
  Can you hear me crying.
  
  There’s an ocean between us.
  You know where to find me.
  You reach out and touch me.
  I feel you in my own heart.
  More than a lifetime.
  Still goes on forever.
  But it helps to remember
  You’re only an ocean away.
  
  Was there a moment when I felt no pain.
  I want to feel it in my life again.
  Let it be over now.
  Oh Oh over now.
  ‘Cause I remember all the days and nights
  We used to walk the streets of neon lights
  Oh I want you here with me.
  Oh be here with me.
  
  There’s an ocean between us.
  You know where to find me.
  You reach out and touch me.
  I feel you in my own heart.
  More than a lifetime
  Still goes on forever.
  But it helps to remember
  You’re only an ocean away.
  
  So many times you always wanted more,
  Chasing illusions that you’re longing for.
  Wish I wasn’t crying.
  Can you hear me crying.
  
  There’s an ocean between us.
  You know where to find me.
  Just reach out and touch me.
  I feel you in my own heart.
  More than a lifetime
  It seems like forever.
  But I’ll always remember
  You’re only an ocean away.
  
  Only an ocean away.

  
  

  Music: Per Andréason
  Lyrics: Per Andréason / Don Black

  • 8:05 pm
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