Oh well, well, well…. As I´m here at a cyber cafe waiting for my land lady to send me the rent contract of the apartment to my  e-mail( yes, I love the Internet) let me post some pictures of the places I have been recently.

They are the same I have already been, though there was not problem to me at all. I spent Christmas at my friend´s farm again, however, this time with a bit less people. It was great as last year.

Well, they scanned the snaps in a weird way, but there we go: there are pictures of the farm and the ranch I went to. I spent the New Year´s holiday at my friend´s ranch with her mom and  her step father(they are at the picture.sorry, i was busy shooting it ). they are there on the  second column. I just want to point out 2 things about those pictures. One, is that as i had mentioned before, we´re in the summer now. So, no snow for me, neither white landscapes. All is green, or colored by the blooms. Also people think everyone in South America is used to green places. Well, not when one lives in a huge city as mine. So, whenever I´m close to nature, I return home a bit more renewed. Too obvious One would say, but that´s how I feel.  I hope you enjoy and also hope you can see them. Hope next time I blog  I´m using my own computer…*sigh* Thanks for all the comments, by the way. Sorry if I dont have enough time to reply to you all. But things should be different soon.  I hope.

Spiritual matters have been very much on my mind, and I somehow did  find myself wanting to delve into Religious studies and meditation. However, responsibilities in regard to work or family matters  interfered with my making those desires a reality right now. Didn´t let this get me down. Instead, I stayed focused on the mundane chores and get them done. Then I can move on to fascinating matters that are not of this world.

In other words….. I´m moving  to my new apartment this week…. I´m also without computer so I´ll have to come to cybers from time to time. I hope next time i´m able to post the pictures of my trips. Till there…I´ll read you guys.

Happy New Year!

Hiatus is over

Πhaven’t written in here in a while, 20 whole days long was my hiatus from this blog. I supposed I ought to write in it today just because it’s been sooo long and I finished my classes and most of the things . This month has been one of the most hectic ever. At one point of it I found myself being interviewed and presented for a new job. Something I have so long longed for and yet that is even better than I ever thought. I guess you all already know I´m an English teacher. I have been teaching for over 10 years at a private language school. This time I was called to teach at a regular school to groups from the kinder garten till High school. In addition, I´ll still keep my older job and my private students. Needless to say I have felt the need to start College again. This time a good course on Education and then see where my Masters will take me.

Roommate is getting married in less than a month. I started looking for a new place at the begining of the month and the options were many. The troubles as well! Things like: found the right place but the wrong price and vice versa. Finally, i found a nice apartment, in a nice neigborhood, with 2 nice bedrooms( hey, hey! you guys are invited!) and a wonderful view from the 13th  floor- pictures later!!.  My friends from church  will help me paint it. By the way, this time I´m living alone….Hmm…..good!

Talk about church, i guess i mentioned I was baptized in october. Only now have I got the pictures though. Before showing them, I should mention how life has changed since I accepted God in my life. I have met really wonderful people who are concerned about learning, living and spreading the words of God. People who have also help he keep sane in this transition. I´m so gratful i have found good teachers that help me reach and understand my Lord so well that I cannot feel any diferent but grateful.

This is the front of my church. It´s one of the hundreds Presbyterian churches in Brazil. This and all the pictures below were taken on October 19th, the day I was baptized and made my Public Profession of faith.

This is part the church council, including  three reverends

This was also the day of the church 67th anniversary.  All the departments had a musical presentation to thank God for  this blessed temple.  Below you can see the choir and the orchestra all formed by members of the church. Guess who´ll join  them next year playing the violin, guess, guess??

See this beautiful woman( the one with the loooong hair?) She plays the first violin, and I have classes with her.

Our department sang too…Do i have to point out who I am?

Those are friends who made the Confession of faith together with me. As we waited for the song to end, I bent my head and prayed. To thank God.

Well, that´s it. I may not be around much till next year once I´m traveling and as soon as i return, I shall move.  So  I wish you all have a great Christmas time. I do hope that the one who´s being celebrated be with you on this day and throughout the year to come. Hope we all have a more peaceful year, and that people around  the world learn with each other´s differences as we learn here  at Xanga.

God Bless you all

~Shy

PS. Summer starts here today!!! I´m alteady melting…

Thought collection
I’m looking for something old, something that contains the pitch and resonance of truth, that I can hold under my tongue to season everything else I try to taste. Something ancient to strain out all these insignificant distractions, to focus me for more than thirty seconds at a time.

Maybe I’m looking to shout against the infinite silence to see if my voice might sound clearer in echo. This constant search for newness exhausts me, blunts my thoughts, scrapes my skin raw.

Maybe I simply want to be disappearing into darkness with the vibration of violin strings. Perhaps there I will find cohesion.

I have missed 2 entries on Thanksgiving…. now im mad…

Changes….welcome!

With every step of the journey, you are faced with infinite choices. Each choice will lead you to a whole different life, you will know different people, do different things and be someone different. You make your choice, by serendipity or by careful thought and when you take a step in that direction, the other choices disappear. The doors slam shut behind you with finality. All you can do is look ahead where again your choices lie. Such is life dearest, you can never second guess – only hope that you will be thankful for this life, these things and these people.

light snuck in
and made the doorknob glow
reflections of gold everywhere
bouncing off the walls
shining in my eyes
I woke up
and looked around
and wondered why
you weren’t there
in that space next to me
that id carefully left
just for you
my bed just had me
but there was room
for you
I wondered why
you weren’t laying there
still asleep
eyes closed
lips slightly open
tempting me to wake you
with just a single kiss

Vanity
In this culture of mirrors, I’m searching for anything that will reflect my own image back to me in a more flattering light. Dim these stunning flaws, fill in the gaps within my mind so I don’t realise I need anyone else. Escalate my independence, make loneliness despicable (just a cheap excuse for physical affection – who needs it anyway?).

“Opposites attract” become obsolete in this place where like minds are too accessible. I only have to tolerate my own reflection, the infinite reflections of reflections of myself. I don’t want anything complementary. Only compliments. Tell me I am fine on my own. After all, you are only there to soothe my ego.

Distract me so I cannot see where my self fades thin and threadbare from too much stroking. But only until I become bored with your method of distraction and find someone new to take your place.

Ps.: I couldn´t help biting my nails, I didnt find my new home yet, My trip to Canada  will just depend on my new job, and… Thank you all for the prayers!

.Say a Little prayer for you….

.when anyone is as tired as I am right now, it’s usually after climbing huge unsurpassable mountains, or after running the marathon a few dozen times. no mountains scaled, no tape cut in half by a final surge of breathe. this is the fatigue of success, something that i never thought would come a-knocking so soon. i could have a lil party to celebrate, if my aching body could think straight right now. instead am holed up inside, jabbering to someone i don’t really know. pondering the things that will see me running around tomorrow again. a fresh lap, a few hurdles to jump over. somehow, somewhere i know this is just a meagre start to a long race.

• today I´ll go for an interview to a new job
  
• today I´ll check some new places to move in two months
  
• today I´m supposed to get a call from travel agency about my scholarship in Canada
  
• today I´ll try not to bite my nails.
  
• today I´ll need some good prayers…..         

Thank you all